


All We've Ever Known

by UlternateFreak



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canonical Character Death, F/M, Father-Son Relationship, Gay, Love Confessions, M/M, Mother-Son Relationship, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Sad and Happy, Time Skips
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-03
Updated: 2019-07-03
Packaged: 2020-06-03 06:43:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,510
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19458514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UlternateFreak/pseuds/UlternateFreak
Summary: All Harley has ever known is how to hold his own world in his hands.He has a mother - who rarely has time to mother. A father who up and decided he didn't want to be a father. And a sister who he doesn't know how to be a brother to.When what he knows is called into question - hes scared, frightened - terrified even. And for once he realizes that what he thought he owned - his own shitty little world - isn't his own anymore. Its Peters.Inspired by Hadestown. Follows most-canon events of Infinity War and Endgame.





	All We've Ever Known

**Author's Note:**

> I've become a Parley shipper as of late - and have been wrapping my head about a fic for a long while now.  
> The introduction of Hadestown - the broadway musical - has sparked this into life, filling gaps and holes with ideas of where I wanted this story to go.  
> Well that, and my need to cope after Endgame.
> 
> This story jumps between past and present, which I hope I have managed to convey well enough.

It's the way he doesn't feel that gets him working. That sort of hollow ache that thrums when you know something is missing, but are near powerless to find it.  
He misses Peter. Needs Peter. And Stark knows that better than anyone.

  
When he had returned, his trip to Titan then weeks gone but hardly forgotten, Tony had been broken - a shell of the former man he had only just been.

First an Iron Man, second a Mechanic, but then simply and irrefutably Tony.  
Broken and human.  
It had scared Harley. Reminded him of their short time in Tennessee, which he had only ever truly understood much later in life.  
Peter had called him the Reboot. Insisting that Harley had helped Stark in more ways than he had ever credited himself for.

  
"A reboot?"  
"Yeah," Peter says,"he crashed. So he needed a good old system flush. Sort of like how when your computer bugs out. To put it in simpler terms."  
"Ah, is that how it is?” Harley laughs, “glad you painted it for my simpler mind, Pete."

  
Pepper had mended Stark to the best of her abilities for the first or so month - trying her hardest to please and understand his insistence against most medical help. Those that tended to rely on inner healing rather than physical were immediately booted out.  
He had, of course, given in to the woman's persistence after time - allowing timely sessions of twenty or so minutes with a counselor three times a week.  
And Harley, in truth, had joined him in his efforts - attending similar sessions, if only to let Tony know that he was, in fact, in the same boat as he.

  
It proved a constant, reminding the man that he wasn't as alone as he always seemed to feel. But of course, again - Tony knew that better than anyone. He just simply needed to know and hear it.  
  


"We're connected."  
"And we both had Pete- I mean, Peter."  
Tony usually lingered off upon that name – falling into some distant rhythm that only he could hear – but that day, much to Harley's surprise, the man had only smiled.  
"One of us had him in more ways than I would have preferred, but whatcha gonna do?"

  
Peter and Harley had been near inseparable from the moment they had met. Coming together one Spring vacation in which Harley had been permitted to visit New York City – but more importantly, the Mechanic, and his giant gaudy, and quite frankly, tacky building.

Tony, of course, had put off such a coming for a long while – always seeming to fear the worst.

  
"Hes an intern - sort of - young, 'bout your age - and extremely - say, how old are you, kid?"  
"Sixteen."  
"Sixteen? Well that certainly explains the stilts. You got a license for those?"  
"I ain't that tall. You're just short, old man."

“Alright – listen, I can take much but don't sass me 'bout my age. You wanna meet him – or not?”

  
Peter had introduced himself awkwardly, to say the least - seemingly without thought nor proper preparation on what he was going to first say to him. Or if it had been rehearsed, it hadn't showed.

  
"It was intimidating," he had said, months after the fact - his demeanor now much less guarded with Harley, "you were this story told in legends. That's how he'd tell them anyway. And honestly - I hadn't known what to expect."  
"Its alright," Harley laughed, "I was just too gorgeous up close. I get it."

  
In truth, it had been Harley to see Peter as the extremely pretty and well endearing creature that he, in fact - without effort - was. A fact that Tony had noticed right off the bat.

  
"And what makes you think I like him?"  
"Besides the ogling, or the tongue that drops out your mouth? Come on, kid, give me a break - you turn into a Tex Avery cartoon every time he walks into the room."  
"A what?"  
"Wolf - Red hot riding hood? No? Never mind. Look. All I'm gonna say, is either you say something, or clean up the drool."

  
That week had gone by much too fast. And Harley had returned to Tennessee without saying a word to Peter about his slight attraction, but nevertheless a neat new phone number scrawled into his arm on a last moments whim. If the train ride had gone by quickly this time 'round – it was only due to the thoughts of a certain doe-eyed boy. 'Cause such a trip was horrendous – and if given the choice – Harley would gladly choose any other place then to return to Rose Hill, Tennessee.

To Peter, he had put it simply.

“Every-bodies either hungry or tired. The wage is nothing. And the work is hard. It's a graveyard.”

  
Months had gone by, text and talks laying in between the two if time permitted such luxuries- but Harley only ever saw Peter on the screens, fighting and nearly dying from the countless villains that seemed to arise in the streets of New York. He, however, at the time, hadn't known it to be Peter of course.

  
Harley. hes cool.  
Peter. Really?  
Harley. Yeah. always saving peoplw. Looks cool on tv  
Peter. They have tvs in the outback?  
Harley. There new. Color and talking and evything. Asshole  
Peter. Joking  
Harley. I think hes hot  
Peter. ?  
Harley. Spiderman

  
Suppose that's how he came out to Peter Parker - a simple 'hes hot' to which Peter had simply responded to with some actress or another being hot in his own opinion. That – and some girl by the name of Michelle Jones – who apparently attended Mid-town High and was head of their decathlon team.

He had tried not to be bothered by his newfound friends clear heterosexuality, but what could really be done? He liked Peter. And perhaps, in time, he could cope with that particular fact.

As per usual.

  
Days on end, Stark would hide away - the Avengers now near disbanded without knowing what to do in the wake of the Snap – and him, seeking a void that couldn't ever truly shelter him.

Hell, no one could really be sheltered – all had come to lose light. How did one strive forward when half of everything everyone ever knew vanished in a single afternoon? If anything, the day might have just died off likewise – with how empty the streets seemed to be.

“It's chaos,” Pepper said one afternoon – reading along to the weeks most current headline, “the world has come to a halt.” She looked to Harley. “Whose going to run the governed jobs - the public transportation-?”

Then there was the mourning - the cries and confusion, the quick rush of who and what was to blame for such a catastrophe. Perhaps that was it, in truth, the reason for the disband – the Avengers had to hide. Everyone sought them. To hate. To loathe. To blame.  
Sometimes Harley wished he could blame a single person himself. Could blame the man that gave him so much, to only let him down and let another take it all.

But he couldn't. Not with Peter gone. Nor his mother and sister.  
He had no one, but the Mechanic. Which is why he moved to the cabin just behind the lake. Sanctioned off with his newfound but barely sustainable family.

  
"Its time to eat," Pepper said. "And you will eat. I already deal with that one, so I wont take no for an answer from you."  
He had nodded, watching her in a sort of way that a child watched a nanny or a babysitter upon first command. And such a look would last for months, turning softer in under a year before coming close to affection.  
A doting son - and a mother who hadn't expected to gain and yet miss out on so much.  
He wasn't her baby. He wasn't her blood. But he was her son.  
The world had simply made it so.

Which wasn't right – and wasn't natural.

  
"He misses him terribly," Pepper said one afternoon - a small cup of tea before them. "Won't ever say it anymore. But then he looks off into that lake."  
"What do you think he sees?"  
"Ashes? I don't know. Could be anything. But it all goes back to him."  
"He blames himself-"  
"Yes," she nodded.  
"...is it bad to think that sometimes I might blame him too?"  
"No," she said, "it isn't. Everyone wants to place blame somewhere – if only to make themselves feel better. Even if they don't. I know you don't blame him. Not really. Else you wouldn't care nor love him as I do."  
"I miss him too," Harley then said – taking his cup in hand. "Just as he does."  
"I know, sweetie. I know."

  
Pepper had been the first to know. The first to really know, and hear as to how Harley was truly feeling over the other boy.  
It had happened the Summer after the first meeting in Spring. He had taken the train again, this time- a weighted ride that proved fantastically boring, and terribly thrilling all the same.

The light engine had rumbled and echoed beneath his feet, his body buzzing with anticipation and jumbled-up nerves. From the nothingness of backwoods Tennessee he had come to larger sights of towers and lights. Just as then. A world only known through filtered images and videos passed through particles in the air and onto a screen.

  
He had hoped to be plastered against Peter's side again. Instead, he had gone to Pepper that first night in, his eyes sad and heart readily opened to tell.

A weak moment, he would understand later – but then a comfort. And she had known before he had even spoken as to how he was feeling.

  
"He likes her. I get it. I get why, but..."  
"I know," she said. "I know."  
And she had. And he had.  
But Peter had chose Mj - choosing, meaning in a sense, not knowing, but still picking the girl to stand by his side instead of him.  
And when Harley had spoken short and without merit upon learning this, Peter hadn't understood. Nor had he learned still after informing Mj about his friends shift in mood. A talk that had only left the girl with a small knot blooming within her chest.  
They had met only a handful of times - most of what she knew of him stemming from Peter's own ramblings, but had seen the look in which he had gifted the other upon their reunion at the train station. A look, she supposed, that she wore from time to time herself.

Peter, she knew, wouldn't see nor understand it. After all, it had taken nearly a year for him to realize that she had been interested all along.

  
Looking to the lake, Harley awaited for whatever took hold of Tony to take him. Be it a sea creature, a space grape - or simply an arrow to the chest.

Most days, he admitted, were doable - passable despite the wishing to awake from the nightmare and simply find it all a terrible dream, or even a state undone by the time the credits could roll. Then there were days like today, where the world felt heavy and mundane - the air much too humid and clinging against your skin like a second layer. Sticky and damp, but irremovable no matter how many times you attempted to wash it all away.

  
"He isn't ever coming back, is he?" He asked to no one in particular. "Or any of them."  
In another world, the answer would have come crashing down from the sky. Much like the new learned hero, Miss - er, Captain Marvel. But she was galaxies away - and hadn't any clue as to how to continue on as the rest of them.

And she too kept busy- adjusting a universe on the brink of dying because so many had already fell six feet down. If only that could be true, in itself. The underworld was far better suited for the dead. At least then, there was a name as to where they were.

A body. A knowing. An understanding.  
"Are you down there, Pete?" He, again, asked to no one. "Down below?"  
"Do you really want to know?"  
He had startled a second at Tony's voice, but did not turn to address the man. Not with the tears that dared to gather upon the cheeks of his face. They had done many things together, but never cried. No. Such things were meant to be done alone. Or with Pepper.  
"Kid. How far would you dare go?" Tony then asked, stepping forward but minding the wall build by the other.  
"To the end of time," Harley said, surprising even himself with how quickly he had responded. "To the end of the earth, if I have to.”

“Do you really mean that, kid?”  
He nodded. "With all my heart."  
"Well," Tony said, " that's a start."

  
Time was complex - and to harness it, or even control it, meant going against the very fabric of nature and it's established rules of reality.  
But the goal was simple - despite its impossibility - go back and retrieve the stones from the past to save the current future. And to do so, they'd have to play with their own history – keeping mind to stay out of sight.

“If they ask your name – you don't got one.” Tony said. “And don't look anyone in the eye, kid. We don't need to meddle and cause any disturbances-”

“I get it.”

  
Peter, Harley supposed, would have been so proud of the path set out before them.

  
"I love Back to the Future," the boy said, stuffing a handful of popcorn into his mouth, "top ten at least."  
"We know," Mj said, "you picked it."  
Harley snorted, giving the girl a smirk as he did.

It was something, he supposed. To try and act as his normal self around the couple. And she appreciated it. Could tell that he, in fact, was doing just that. Trying.

  
"I know, by the way. Just so it's all out there and clear."  
"I know," he said, turning to face Mj directly, despite the now blossoming resurgence of cheese puffs threatening to raise up from his stomach. “I mean – I know that you know.”  
Peter had excused himself to the restroom only a minute before. And on screen, Marty Mcfly had just managed to retrieve the sports almanac.  
"I know you know," she said. "But still. You know?"  
"I know." He tossed the bag of chips to his feet – and offered her a kind smile. “Wanna watch The Shining next?”  
  
That 'talk' had sparked the beginnings of an odd trio. The occasional foursome, should Ned have been involved – but mainly the three. Usually, it had started – and had meant – to be two, but almost always Peter would include Harley, thus making it a three.. And he would protest, and try to hide away – only to always be forced by kind words and a brilliant smile.

For the most part, Mj would take it just fine. After two or so consecutive weeks, however, not so much.

  
"I'll stop-"  
"It isn't like that." She said. "I mean, it isn't a 'you' sort of problem."  
"It's not?" He asked.  
"No," she said. "He forces you. And always places himself between us. Me, on the right. And you, on his left." She paused. “I know how hard it is to say 'no' to him.”  
"I'm sure he doesn't mean anything by it."  
"I'm sure he doesn't realize that he means anything by it." She had turned on her heels then, her hand just grazing over a bomber jacket on display.  
They had come to purchase the new Star Wars Van's just released that week. Tony had offered to buy via air mail of course - though Peter had wholeheartedly insisted to earn them himself.

So there they found themselves that afternoon – wandering about the Manhattan Mall located on 33rd and Sixth Avenue.

It was grand – much like everything else in NYC.  
"So what then?" Harley asked. “Are you going to say anything to him?”  
Mj simply shrugged. “I don't know how.”  
  
It came to no surprise - by Summers end – that the two had broken it off-

“Indefinitely-” Peter said.

“Is 'indefinitely' good?” Harley asked – honestly confused by that term and it's very loose and vague connotations.

“I don't know-!”

Part of Harley - suspected to a degree - that Mj had planned the breakup to exact 'science', seeing as she had orchestrated it all to be said and done with an exact week left of his stay in New York. Peter, after all, would need someone to mope about with - and seeing as Ned had gone off to the Philippines to visit family only the month before, the duty of shoulder-bearer had fallen onto Harley.

“You'll know what to do.”

So he did his best to offer the usual comfort - consoling the poor broken Peter, who neither understood or accepted the break up altogether.

  
"I just don't get it. I thought we were good?"  
"Did she say anything specific?"  
"Only that she felt like I needed to learn something," he said. "But what could that mean?"  
Harley understood - to a point. But was still uncertain about the girls intentions. If sole-quality time was what she had wanted – then why not simply explain such things to Peter? What had he to learn aside from that?

“ _I don't know how.”_  
  


"Was that all?" He asked.  
Peter nodded, and buried his face in what was now a rag mixture of spit and tears. That 'rag' being, of course, Harley's own jacket.  
  
The end of Summer had brought with it a shift between them - so by that parting day - in which Harley had set foot onto the familiar train platform once more - things had become almost sorrowful. So Harley, being weak and of mortal flesh and blood, had given into his affections, and had neatly pressed a kiss to the others cheek.  
It had been chaste, and sweet, and unsurprising to all present other than Peter himself. Who had simply stuttered out with an awkward salute as a farewell in turn.

  
By now, another Summer had passed again - with Tony close to figuring out the numbers and trials based in what they were doing with the quantum realm. Months prior things had almost halted – he, nor Banner, anywhere close to understanding the physics and logistics of what they were trying to attempt. Luckily a certain Scott Lang had sprung back into life by means of chance - a figure thought long dead the year prior. With his insight, things had taken a massive turn - and now-

  
"I got it," Tony said with an eager smile. He looked between Banner and Harley, the latter only an errand boy, but still very much apart of the helping team as could be.  
"Really?"  
They turned to the Captain - who now sauntered into the room in a way that somehow proved intimidating – yet highly nonthreatening – but also quite seductive. Then again, perhaps that was only the way in which Harley had perceived it. He was, by all means – America's nicest ass-set.  
"Yes," Tony nodded. "I think so."  
Nawh – Harley had decided. Tony viewed the man in the same fashion. That he was entirely sure of.  
  
Things had grown cold between the two after that Summer – the peck now a lingering shame upon Harley's thoughts - with texts few, and far, in between.

  
Harley. Hes ignoring me  
Mj. Busy?  
Harley. Always  
Mj. What bout rn?  
Harley. Patrol

  
Mj had sent him a message then. One which showed herself, with Peter in the background laughing against Ned's shoulder.  
Things had certainly lulled between the two after their breakup, and now they were back to near friends. A trio again. This time, Harley uninvited and thrown aside. Be that by distance or Parker's own choice.

  
After that, Harley had stopped trying - with the only means of contact being those strictly regarding online posts and statuses filtered between Tony, Pepper, Mj, and sometimes Ned throughout the months. They're vague and impersonal in every way.

  
When he returned to New York, that same year but now under Holiday, he hadn't told Peter, nor had he really felt inclined to. He had simply divulged within Tony and Peppers hospitality, enjoying the warm company that was severely lacking at his own home.

He loved his family, really - but his mother was nearly almost always gone, and his sister - well she constantly stayed with a sitter who disliked Harley in every way imaginable. By the time, he had turned thirteen – she had marked him too old for her care – and his mother hadn't protested, needing as much help as she could.

It was a fight, Harley understood – that was easier to let be then to take on.

  
The absence of Peter was felt in the penthouse, but no one dared to say a thing. Not if they wished to break the peaceful balance that had somehow rooted itself, despite the outside world always trying to quell it.

Course Stark always simply had a way with things.

  
"You didn't tell him you were here?"  
"Who?"  
"Peter," Tony said. "Just got off a video call. He asked how we were, and what we're up to at the moment. Imagine his surprise when I mention you, and how you shot egg nogg out your nose-"  
"You didn't-!"  
"You and I both know I did. So what gives, kid? You two fight or something?"  
"Or something," Harley said.

“Typical moody-teenager answer.”

  
He comes to tell Tony after that.

It's a major and distinctive talk about feelings that feels at odds against their usual repertoire It's the most frightening thing really - and the last they'll ever speak like that to each other before the Snap truly causes strain upon them both.

  
"He ghosted me."  
"Sounds like you 'ghosted' each other,” Tony said, irking a near twitch at having to have used that term. "First him - then you. It takes two to tango, kid."

  
Days pass after that - with not much changing between evenings to nights  
Games - small chitchats - lab work - dinners and movies, and lots of holiday goodies that will certainly show come Spring. Harley feels physically thicker 'round the middle - though Pepper coos and continuously feeds him as if hes a starving child.

  
"Get that, will you?"  
The doorbell had startled him - never, not once in all his stays - had he heard a bell to announce a visitor. The computers had simply always alerted them.  
"Might be carolers."  
Tony looks almost smug - and Pepper, bless her heart, is trying her damn hardest to look at ease and completely ordinary.  
She's laughing though – Harley can tell.

  
It's none other than Peter freaking Parker behind the door - a hand knitted scarf tug closely 'round his neck, with an ugly matching sweater to match. In his hands, which are readily outstretched before him, is a box that is terribly wrapped with the most sickening of Christmas papers that Harley has ever had the misfortune of seeing.  
"Merry Christmas, Harley Keener." He simply says, smiling as if everything is right in the world.

And it is – for the moment. Peter Parker makes it so.

He simply makes you see how the world can be – in spite of the way that it is.

  
Staring at the room - his room – Harley wondered how long Tony would be. The man had told him to wait at home - for what, he hadn't known. But he had taken the truck. So he had crawled into bed, not really sleeping, but not really doing much of anything else.  
He simply stared, and watched.  
Hanging behind his closet door, he could see the awful cowboy hat that Tony had gifted him last Christmas. It read, in tinsel-like lettering, 'Merry Christmas, Partner'. There of course had been a set of keys to his brand new car hidden within it, but now it simply was a hat that he refused to throw away despite how much he hated it.

Beneath that, and to the right, is a silver watch that sits on a shelf.

Peter had given that to him - but more so than that, he had configured an A.I. system into it with Tony's help, which he had nick-named Calvin.

  
"You can change it - just thought it was funny, you know? Calvin-"  
"Klein," Harley smiled. "I caught that."  
"He functions similar to Karen - can even access her in case you ever need to reach me in the suit." Peter had said the latter so sheepishly that Harley had immediately thought it extremely adorable and had wanted to kill himself there and then.  
"That's awesome. Thanks, Pete."

  
By now, the watch is simply a watch again. The A.I. brought and reconfigured into a suit that sits in the shed - Ala Tony Stark style.  
Pepper had been furious about it at first, but understood the reasoning behind it all. What's to happen this coming week will be dangerous. And Harley knows that, in truth, there are three suits in case things go to hell rather quickly.

One – red and gold. A second – lilac and silver. And a third, taking from both – red and silver.

  
They never talk about the 'fight', but rather return to what had begun that Summer. Only this time it's very much a duo - with the occasional foursome if Tony and Pepper can stand them long enough. They're loud and overeager - and always trying to outdo or impress the other.

  
"You two are adorable," Tony says one afternoon, not looking at Harley, but smirking down at blueprints mapped out on the bench beneath him.  
"What?"  
"Nothing," he said.  
He hums a wedding march after that, annoying the other to no end.

  
"Wheres your aunt?"  
"May's working," Peter says "A lot lately. Always happens 'round the holidays."  
"Understandably."  
"Your mom?"  
"Yeah, hence my stay here." Harley motions with both his hands. “Course I ain't complaining.”  
"See? And here I thought it was just because of me."  
It's a joke, Harley can tell - but he feels a flush easily creep up his neck and onto his face.  
"You wish, Parker," he says, turning away and off into the night.  
The skyline of New York is brilliant at night, especially 'round the holidays. And Peter had said it best when he had convinced him to accompany him onto the roof of the tower.  
There's a moment of silence between the two - interrupted only by the bright and chipper voice of Calvin, who informs them that both Pepper and Tony are looking for them.  
"Tell them we'll be right in," Harley says, already on the brink of standing.  
"Harley-?"  
Peter halts his motion - his much stronger grip holding him back despite the minimal strength hes allowing himself to use.

“Yeah?”  
Whatever Harley expects is quickly shoved aside – mostly in favor with the pair of lips that meet against his cheek.  
"I had wanted to give that to you at the door too," Peter says. "But..."  
He ducks his head like a child - which would have absolutely floored Harley if he hadn't already been paralyzed to the world about him. "Mr. Stark was watching."  
  
Things changed again after that - the week of actual Christmas being treated between the Tower and Peter's apartment in Queens.

May is warm and kind - and looks to Harley as Pepper has come to do, but without reason and without trial. She simply becomes this other guardian in an instant. And perhaps that sentiment lays in the way Peter's world alights with the other teen in it.  
Hes eating hungrily, again, and laughing at corny jokes, and just being so damn Peter that she instantly loves Harley for bringing him back to life after Mj.  
"You're good for him," she says one night in which she places a blanket over the two of them. Harley is only half awake, with Peter nudged into his side on the small expanse of couch. But he'd seen her, and she knew that he had.

  
The 'time machine' is uprooted in the hanger – sitting large and proud – and erected up to the ceiling. It's without a doubt, so scientific looking that it scares and impresses Harley in equal strides.  
"Looks like a doomsday device," he laughs, stepping onto the platform with bare feet.

Nebula – the blue girl from space – nods to the sentiment, and places a hand against the machines mechanics. Shes cool – and bad-ass – and if Harley wasn't helplessly gay and in love, he might have considered it.  
"Its gotta be,” Tony says, “needs to be if we're gonna undo this hell of a mess."

“Whatever it takes,” Nebula nods. “Right?”

“Right,” both Harley and Tony agree.

  
The year journeyed to, is 2012 – Harley believed – really, he hadn't been entirely focused on the inept details - following only the word of Tony as to what he was expected to do. Dates and such, aren't his forte – especially when the continuity of everyone's stories always seemed to differ depending on who was telling it.  
At either rate, Harley's mission is to blend in as an intern at Stark towers and assist in hijacking the Tesseract from the then Agents of Shield.  
It goes relatively fine - a few mishaps between - before the Tesseract is being tossed across the floor due to a sudden Hulk appearance from past Banner. It's ridiculous and out of left field that a new journey is forced to be taken. One that calls for Harley to miss due to his age being a factor hindering against the time and place they must turn to.  
So he returns back to base – after only an hour, and sulks– only a smidgen of a pout at having been sidelined from the mission.

But it's alright. Its for the best to do what they need to do.

  
Peter was up before him on Christmas morning - chatting away with May who was attempting an edible breakfast. It's mainly runny eggs and burnt bacon, but Harley is loving it all the same.  
By the time presents are given out - Tony and Pepper are sitting cozily together. And though May had feared Tony being Tony, the philanthropist billionaire playboy, he had only stuck to low costing gifts (as far as she is concerned) - mainly forced upon by Peppers hand. There's an ugly cowboy hat for Harley - with a hidden key set only known to Harley via a written note in a card - and an Ironman onesie for Peter - that, he later finds out, hides a pair of ear-pods that Peter had been dying to own. And would have to die for in order to purchase them himself.  
Pepper gives them both a pair of reasonably priced shoes - matched with a jacket, for Peter, that May has been able to pay for herself. She looks a bit off-put, handing Harley only a scarf that has been clearly mended by her own hand in a haste. Its red and blue - with a small black spider patterned at the bottom.

  
"I chose the colors," Peter smiles – onesie already fitted around his form.  
"I know it isn't much-"  
"No," Harley says to May and her slight forced smile, "I love it. Really-" He wraps the scarf around his neck - finding it surprisingly soft and warm, and smelling much like a mixture of what the apartment carries.  
If he hugs her tightly more than usual than it's to convey how much he appreciates her for everything she has offered him.

  
"I hadn't realized you were branding yourself," he says to Peter later that evening. Once there out on the roof again - only this time in Queens.  
"Well you said he was hot."  
"That's a low blow," he laughs, "that was way before I knew-"  
"What? You're saying I'm not hot anymore now that you know?"  
"Didn't say that." He purposely eyes the onesie, which stirs a scoff from Peter.

  
The whole 'Is Peter Spider-man?' thing had been a funny coming out, all things considered.

Harley hadn't even guessed it beforehand - but once he had walked in on Peter between dress from spider suit to street clothes - well it had certainly cemented itself into stone and in mind from that day onward. And the other had tried to play it off - desperately claiming it a costume - but the tech had been obvious, all signs of Stark Industries in every stretch.  
That had been the mid Summer before - when Peter and Mj had just started going out.

She, just weeks before, had found out too-

“And I figured it out,” she had said, “he didn't tell me. Just so we're clear.”  
  


Harley thinks himself mad - for allowing himself to divulge into everything that is Peter Parker. It'll only ever lead to heartache – he knows and understands that - but still he gives into the cuddles and snuggles that the other boy offers. And they're constantly touching each other - whether it be in shoulders or elbows - or even straight caresses that are meant to be innocent and childish.  
He is mad.

Mad at himself for thinking more than it is, and tainting ideas of lust and attraction between them. Peter is pure, and he is not. Things between them aren't meant to be skewered as anything other than friendship.

  
"I hate myself."  
"Is that the title of your new book?" Tony asks – wrench in hand. "'Cause I've already copyrighted self-loathing. So expect my people to sue your people, Billy Elliot."  
"Billy Elliot wasn't even gay-"  
"Okay, then you can be the tutu-wearing best-friend. How's life? Still crushing on Billy Parker?"  
"I hate you."  
"Is that your sequel?”

“Fuck you-”

“Language. Look, kid. I can feel the feels up to the ceiling. Just tell him."  
"No - I cant. It'll weird him out again."  
"I swear."  
"What?"  
"You two are the way you are with each other and you've never thought twice 'bout it? I've seen a supercomputer accept feelings over a witch faster than you two."  
"You're wrong."  
"You're right. He was more of an over glorified toaster. Oh – and really, watch the f-bombs. Else Pepper is gonna grab the soap. And I'm not kidding.”

  
Nat doesn't return from Vormir.  
And for a moment, things are dispelled. A soul for a soul stone, is what Clint had said. And she had willingly paid the price to bring them all back.  
Banner doesn't take it easy, Hulking out and destroying one of the Avenger jets in the process. He only calms with kind and hushed words by the Asgardian – who, again, needs to stop existing for Harley's sake.

In the end, Harley had only ever spoken to the other arachnid figure once or twice - both being in the wake of the Snap, midst the chaos and planning at the compound. She had always seemed intimidating beforehand, but when actually spoken to - softer and mellow.

  
"So your Tony's other kid, then?"  
"I guess." Harley shrugs.  
"Well, I'm Natasha-"  
"I know. I mean Tony's told me 'bout you before-"  
"Tony? Not Mr. Stark?"  
"That's Peter's thing. He worships him, not me. I think hes an idiot most days."  
"I heard that." Tony shouts from somewhere behind them.  
Natasha laughs, honest and pure. And again, he curses his heart for not being able to appreciate her as many are likely to do. "I like this one."  
"Really warms on you, huh?" Captain offers, passing with a clear and brilliant smile.  
"That's it." Tony then says. "I'm going back and stopping you all from being born."  
"That's not how time travel works," Banner says - again, from somewhere beyond them.

“You're first.”

  
New Years Eve is awkward - at least, the last five minutes are with everyone crowded 'round the top floor of the Avenger Tower. On screen, the ball is set and ready - and about the room, various guests are huddled together in clusters. It becomes painfully obvious that most have some sort of partner to their side. And in Harley's case, hes with Peter - but both are looking anywhere but at each other as everyone turns to engage themselves within the count down.  
Its agonizing and torture - sitting without stirring or speaking for the four full minutes, until it finally begins.  
"Alright-!" Stark announces, a crappy tin-foiled hat strung onto his head, "here we go, Y2K 2.0!"  
Harley rolls his eyes and looks to Peter instantly - the need to retort to the other winning over. But then the countdown begins and Harley's stomach drops.  
And Peter's looking at him - crude green-tinted glasses and all.  
"10-9-8-7-6-5-4-3-”  
It happens quickly - too soon - and out of tempo - that they both lean in the same direction, confusing the path-  
"2-1-HAPPY NEW YEAR!"  
They both drop away - not daring to make direct eye contact with how badly that had turned out.

  
They don't talk about it - much like everything else that seems to transpire between them - and all too soon, Harley must leave again. And it's even worse this time around - tears and all - with a larger crowd bidding farewell to witness it all.

  
"I'll be back," Harley tries with a head tucked forcefully between his collarbones. "Watch. It'll be Spring in no time at all.”  
Peter just nods, but doesn't let go until he undoubtedly has to.  
"Just wait for me, Pete."  
"I will."

  
The skyscrapers turn into roads and freeways - the freeways into fields and off patched communities. It's a strange transition - and to Harley, a long way path leading down and into ordinary nothing.  
Hes a country boy at heart - but the city has become something to him - a remarkable sort of something that he can't exactly place a name to.

Each time he returns - it's like taking a road less traveled. In his case, a road less wanted.

  
Harley. I miss nyc already  
Peter. It's only been a week  
Harley. Too long. would may deny me life on her couch?  
Peter. She hasn't kicked me out  
Harley. Be right over then  
Peter. Bring tacos

He brings tacos once Spring has come again - a fact that causes Peter to roll his eyes, even as hes pressed firmly into his chest.

  
"You're kinda late with that-"  
"Does that mean you don't want 'em?" Harley asks.  
"Didn't say that."

  
They hangout with May until Tony is available - too pressed in press meetings to be present at Harley's arrival. And it's fine, really - Peter and May had been more than enough of a welcome party once he had stepped onto the platform. Yet still the man insists on a grand dinner at some fancy dancy place that Harley has absolutely no clothes for. Which is why he takes both boys shopping, and has them dressed in matching attire come evening. Peter is in a fine wine burgundy - and Harley in a royal night navy. Both with the others color as a tie.  
It's a date, in all regards - despite Pepper and Tony being present at a second table right besides their own. And Harley knows it. Can read it between the lines of Tony's crisp and smug smile as he raises a toast to them.

  
It ends terribly - with Harley finding out that he and lobster don't exactly mix.

  
"I'm telling you, I'm losing it - I need to scratch-"  
"No-!" Both Pepper and Peter shout.  
"It'll scar-"  
"I'm fine with scars-!"  
"Just wait," Peter says, talking hold of Harley's hands and forcing them away from his now blemished skin, "Mr. Stark will be back with the ointment and pills soon."  
"This sucks! And I ruined dinner-"  
"You didn't know. It's fine, really. We can all go again-"

Harley hates lobster.

The sores are ugly and red – and lasts mostly until the next afternoon.

The upside? Peter offers to put ointment on the places he can't reach well enough.

It's terrible – and exciting – and Harley refuses to turn off his stomach in fear of Peter noticing a certain reaction down below.

“Does it still itch?”

“No,” Harley says, “it feels alright now.”

“So no ointment then?”

“Uh...maybe I should – just so they heal faster?”

Peter nods. And this time it's different – and Harley permits himself to turn about so Peter can do his chest – who is all at once confused before becoming slightly eager.

“You like to please people – don't you, Pete?”

“I suppose,” he answers. “I like being helpful.”

All Harley has ever known is how to hold his own world in his hands.

He has a mother - who rarely has time to mother. A father who up and decided he didn't want to be a father. And a sister who he doesn't know how to be a brother to. Hes simply Harley, the boy in town who coops himself up in his shed, who occasionally does the odd job to save money - and whose never had someones eye long enough to matter. He has crushes - has other 'Peter's' in his past - only ideals, and never friends - and without real consequence aside from a wounded heart and tears that heal over once spilled.  
Nothing is what he knows, and hes learned to deal it.  
And yet when it happens - when what he knows is called into question - hes scared, frightened - terrified even. And for once he realizes that what he thought he owned - his own shitty little world - isn't his own anymore. Its Peters.  
His world is locked away in the embodiment of one Peter Benjamin Parker - behind his eyes, beneath his skin - and inside the veins that feed into his beating heart.  
It isn't a crush. It isn't simply a crying session overcome by a talk with Pepper - a secret to be conspired and pitied in looks - or a spiel of denials to Tony Stark. It's more than that.

Harley can't exactly put it into words. Not those that he can speak. Not to Peter. So he cowards, and writes it down on paper - writes down his whole heart onto a piece of ink-jet copy paper that he steals from the computer room downstairs.  
Its cheesy - and terrible - and by far the hardest thing he has ever written  
A suicide note, he reasons, would be easier.

_I've been alone so long - that I never knew I was alone-_

_You are sunlight-_

_I wanna hold you - I don't ever wanna have to let you go-_

"That's terrible," he says to himself. "No. What's the matter with you?"

The next several drafts prove just as bad.

Its the last day.  
Last of Spring - last afternoon, before Harley has to return to the train station come morning - and it's the last time he'll come to see Peter Parker in person before everything is taken from him.  
From everyone.

He and Peter sit in mostly silences - another Parker choice film playing on the screen before them.  
It's a no brain-er that Peter is obsessed with nostalgic films of the 80's, or 70's - but even Harley hadn't considered the boy a John Hughes fan. Yet here they were, watching back to back films - this one now being the Breakfast Club, with the title song just on the brink of starting up again.  
It's parting - and it's telling - that this is the last movie they watch together.  
And when Judd Nelson raises his fist into the air - Peter breaks-  
"Harley-?"  
Harley turns to the other - broken out from the screen and the heartwarming tune of the film. "Yeah?"  
"Do you think they come back together on Monday morning?"  
"Who?"  
"The Breakfast Club."  
Harley looks back to the screen. "Uh - yeah. I think so. I like to think that they do."  
"Me too," Peter nods.

"It isn't all make believe, right?"  
Harley stirs - his eyes opening to the expanse of darkness now around him. It'd figure that he'd fall asleep on the couch - and not his actual room in the tower where he'd receive a much better rest.  
"Pete-?" He turns over to find Peter still at his spot on the other end of the large couch. He looks to have drifted off himself - body in a similar position to that of Harley.  
"That they're friends. And that they'll still be friends on Monday?”  
Harley can hardly believe that the others still fixated upon the movie.

Still, he sits up.  
"No, Pete. You can't just pretend something like that away. Jeez. What time is it?"  
"Some of them became more than friends-"  
"Yeah," Harley nods, "they did. We should probably head to our rooms-"  
"You're leaving again. Tomorrow.”  
Again he nods. "Yeah, I am."  
"Are we friends, Harley?"  
"Of course, Pete-"  
Peter raises then, tucking his legs beneath himself as he does.  
"You sure?"  
"Yeah - of course."

Peter Parker is one of the bravest people Harley has ever met - and is ever likely to ever meet again. And it isn't the sort of bravery that is brash and reckless - nor is it the sort of bravery that is done to attain glory. It's simply goodness. He does what is right for those that he loves - and is willingly willing to put himself in danger to show those that he loves how much he truly cares.

It's no surprise that Peter is the first to make a move.

He leans in and kisses Harley in the dark.

"W-why did you do that?" Harley nearly stutters, the words coming together close and without true thought. It's simply all he knows to say at the moment.  
"'Cause I knew you wouldn't," Peter says.

When morning comes, they haven't talked about it.

Why would they?

Haven't even given into a second try after the first.  
And it's the biggest regret of Harley's life.  
Waving off from the train with nothing, as always, said to Peter who idly watches him go for the last time.

Peter goes off to a field trip or another - stalling words between them for a while, with Harley not wanting to bother him and Peter not knowing where they really stand.

The Snap happens the day Peter returns - and Harley's entire world is taken and destroyed. He watches as Spider-man and Iron-man fly into space - hears of the news occurring in Wakanda - and watches as his sister disappears into ashes before his very eyes.  
He'll learn of his mother come sunset.  
And learn of Tony and Peter come sunrise.  
It isn't entirely surprising, when at eight or so in the morning - Pepper finds Harley at her penthouse. Bags in hand – and eyes red and deceased.

He had taken the train again. But this time it had been agonizing – and near impossible to book with how the world is crumpling apart. And yet somehow, he had managed. If only to return to the place where they had begun. It's what he knows.

The war is won. Briefly – and things are set right, with Bruce snapping everyone back into existence via the gauntlet and Infinity Stones. At first it isn't a for sure success - but then the calls swarm in, alighting their cellular phones from those once gone. Who now, presumably, are reappearing from where they had vanished.  
That peace and success, however, is short lived – for the mad Titan returns to Earth for one final showdown.  
Harley, in his efforts, takes to his suit - and officially becomes, bestowed upon a small gesture by his mentor and Mechanic - Iron Lad.  
He fights alongside the Avengers - seeing, but never speaking, to Peter who returns with the hundreds of others via portals in the sky.  
They'll have time, he thinks - all the time in the world once Thanos and his army are defeated.  
Pepper fights likewise - and for a moment, he, her, and Tony Stark fight alongside each other. And Peter knows - Harley's sure of it - that he, Harley, is in the third suit.

The war is won. Briefly - things are again set right, with Tony snapping away the Titan and his army via the gauntlet and Infinity Stones.

Then it sets in – the sacrifice made on behalf of Iron-man - the Mechanic - Tony Stark.

It sets in – and all too soon, he is dead. And Pepper is holding his body – crying with an arm wrapped around Harley who sits just at her side.

He knows Peter is besides them – Captain and Rhodey likewise – but it's all too hard. Too cold to hold onto anyone other than Pepper.  
And the world mourns - and it brightens, for all souls are returned and the world is set into balance once more. A soul for millions. That's the price.

The funeral is private - and personal. Those in attendance are those of family and friends – and Harley never once leaves Pepper's side. Even with his mother returned - he shall not leave her, and she knows. And he knows. That his stay is indefinite at the cabin by the lake.  
It needs to be - for Pepper is expecting, and will need all the help she can get. And, perhaps, in time – Harley can learn how to be a brother for the child without a father.

He knows – as well as Tony surely would have – that she's gonna make a great mother.

And this time – the child would be her baby.

  
Pepper asks May and Peter to stay with them – indefinitely as well – seeing as their apartment is no longer leased to them.  
Much of the world is like this - with those once gone now back and in need of service to move forward in a world that had continued to grow in their absence.  
The Captain - and what is left of the core Avengers vow to be there, and create a support system through Stark Industries called the Stark Act. Its meant to fund those in need, and offers emotional support and counseling for all who seek it.  
The world is still broken.  
But perhaps, in time, it can be mended.

It isn't until after the funeral that Harley and Peter actually meet.  
And they don't talk, at first, but simply come together in a tight embrace that ends with Harley pressing a kiss to Peter's forehead.  
They're both crying, and its terribly depressing and loving - but they don't let go of each other.  
And for once, they don't have to.

When Spring comes again – the world has grown, and has shifted into a brighter day that's not been seen in nearly over a year.

It's beautiful – and saddening – and frightening.

For Harley tells Peter – and Peter listens – of everything that he's ever felt – since the first of their meeting, to the last of goodbyes at a railroad line.

And he talks of his jealousy – of his fears – of that kiss on New Years Eve, and that last night he could never let go of.

And they talk of Tony. And they cry. And Peter leans in to initiate their second kiss. Always the braver of the two – and always just so damn Peter Parker about everything that its sickening.

And Harley tells him-

“I love you.”

And he kisses him.

And Peter says, in turn. “I know.”

Which is really – expected – and nerd-ishly stupid – and Harley wouldn't have expected anything else.

“You get it-?” He asks with a goofy smile that is entirely unfair. “It's from Star-”

“I caught that,” Harley simply says, kissing Peter for the third time.

  


**Author's Note:**

> I honestly have no idea how to promote a sequel or anything - but if you enjoyed this fic than I hope you check out "Say That The World Won't Ever Change", which is more or less a companion piece to this told through Peter's perspective.   
>  \- With regards


End file.
